Australia has unfortunately picked up the American phrase, passed on, and that has religious connotations, as passed on to a better place, perhaps heaven, maybe hell, but is there anywhere for we who are at times good and at times bad?
In response to someone who uses passed, I will use the word passed, but for me the words are dead or has died. In my personal life, I have not said passed.
Passed sounds gentler, softer, less confronting. But my Ray did not pass. He died suddenly, with some pain as his guts filled with blood from his ruptured aorta. He passed nowhere. He died while unconscious from blood loss. He's gone. Completely dead.
I know I am out of step with society on this one, and if you say passed on, that is fine with me, but in my life, people have just died and they are dead.
My old blog had a about thirty unpublished posts, and this is the only unpublished post I have, written either on July eleventh or November seventh. I can't tell from 11/7/24 with Blogger inconsistent dating system.
Here is a photo for you. It isn't fake. Apparently you were given time for shopping in Vienna along the way. Would you like to take the trip? The fresh fruit in Vienna is rather good, imported from somewhere, along with apple strudel with vanilla sauce (custard).
"Darling, an omnibus to Calcutta? What fun!"
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A bus from London to Calcutta?! That sounds insane.
ReplyDeleteWhen I worked in newspapers we were taught to avoid all euphemisms for the word "died." A person died, or was dead, and that's the way we had to report it.
"Passed" or "passed on" sound like ways of politely pushing death under the proverbial carpet - making it somehow more polite. "Passed on" where to? Death Valley perhaps.
ReplyDeleteI am with you on this one. Died. Or is dead. Passed on or over are euphemisms I don't use.
ReplyDeleteThat is one looooong bus trip.
Andrew, I’m definitely a dead/died person. Marie, Cheltenham
ReplyDeleteI agree with you in the died/dead thing. For me, "Passed" is up there with "reach out" instead of contact. But then I am probably just an old fuddy duddy.
ReplyDeleteI agree that "passed" sounds gentler. I don't use the word dead, but I do say, as in the case most recently with my Dad, that he died.
ReplyDeleteI use whatever is appropriate for the person I'm talking to. For me, it's 'travelled on,' as that is what I believe. Where to, I do not know, but perhaps we all become stardust.
ReplyDeleteThat photo looks so retro
ReplyDeleteI do say passed on and wish Ray's death would have been gentler. Take special care. Sandra sandracox.blogspot.com
ReplyDeleteYes you are dead when you are dead, but I like to think all my dogs who have passed are in heaven waiting for me to get there. The humans I love can be there as well as as they love my dogs. Heaven you ask? Dogs, comfortable chairs ocean for them to swim in , parks…you get the picture?
ReplyDeleteI don't use any Americanisms, even when I do know what they are supposed to mean. Passed on sounds silly, as does period (for full stop) , diaper, jelly (for jam), drug store (for chemist shop).
ReplyDeleteWe are in agreement, people die. Most everyone that I am around says passed or passed away, it doesn't sound quite right to me. But, I would never directly tell someone that. Whatever.
ReplyDeleteI use die and dead. But I remember people saying passed away and passed on as I grew up in 40s England. I was I taught not to, it was dishonest.
ReplyDeleteMust be one long bus ride. Hope there's plenty of rest stops along the way.
ReplyDeleteAccording to my Google work, the trip took 50 days, passed through 12 countries and was the world's longest bus route. The route ran from 1957 until 1976. I would hope they made more stops than Vienna, for pastries. Ye gods.
ReplyDeleteOh...and about the other. I guess that when I am talking about a death, I use the word 'died'. When I am talking to the bereaved, I try to take my cues from them, and use the words that will comfort them. If they speak of the person's death, that I will refer to it that way.
ReplyDeleteI am a dead/died person. Another pet peeve is the insincere "Sorry for your loss".
ReplyDeletePassed can be confusing, I think. I've used the word 'expired', as someone else once said that to me and I didn't know what they were talking about until it was explained.
ReplyDeleteLovely old bus there.
The only Calcutta I know of is in India and if a bus can drive there and back from London, it's a miracle.
ReplyDeleteI use passed or passed on with some people and died/dead with others, depending on their agaes and whether or not they are religious or have too sensitive natures and don't like the words died or dead. Some I know will say he/she is "with the Lord now".
I agree with die and dead. It gets even weirder here in the USA, "crossed over", "went to be with the lord", are two I often hear or read.
ReplyDeleteI had read about that bus service, a very-very long ride. No I wouldn't try that.
Yes I use died as I do not believe in any God or religion and after Richard died this year I have continued to do so. Passed away/on etc is associated with religious beliefs so that is probably why. But I would never comment on this if the person I am speaking to uses these phrases. Best wishes.
ReplyDeleteI once was reprimanded at work for referring to a person who had died.
ReplyDeletePassed away doesn't work for me and the death doulas I read are in agreement that dead/ died are the only appropriate words. Anyone who has seen a body surely knows that death is final and total.
My church is The Salvation Army and we have a lot of odd little cultural artefacts, salvos who die are "promoted to glory"
What a great way to end a life!
I also do not like the phrase passed. They are dead or died.
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