Gay Bloggers (an unpublished draft post)

I recently remarked in a comment on someone's blog that I only had a couple of posts in drafts. Then I clicked on the draft button and I realised I had quite a few unpublished posts, this being one that was never finished and I am not sure where I was going with it. Mother died in 2023, so the post must have written before then, but not too long before she died. 

Gay male bloggers have one thing in common, well two because they also blog. They may have other things in common, but that is nothing to do with them being gay. Gay men of a certain age often do seek affirmation that they are not abnormal and so are naturally attracted to other gay bloggers. It has been our life to seek being accepted for who we are, individually or as a couple.

But that is as far as it goes. Personalities start to come into it as they do with whoever you may come across in the world of blog. 

I've been dumped by bloggers who I quite liked and I am well aware that I can be challenging at times and I suspect only a couple of times because I am gay and the person didn't initially realise. It will be about what I say rather than what I am.

We visit a bakery about once a week, different days, for me ham, tomato and onion white bread sandwich. I swear it makes the best white bread in Melbourne. This day I changed to a curried egg and lettuce sandwich on white bread. There are four large long tables outside and we prefer to sit at outside, no matter the weather. This day there was one free table, with two bench seats, one of which was wet. Fine, we can sit side by side. I draped my jacket (yes, jacket on the hottest month of our year) over the table to note ownership as I went to a rubbish bin to dump the bird crap laden sponge into a bin that I had cleaned off the car but that didn't stop a couple coming along and sitting at the other end of the table, well not until she cleaned off the seat with serviettes, and she brought some for R to clean off his side of the bench. She was Asian born with a white male partner and she was well known to the owners and staff who all greeted her. 

She had a dog with her. His name was Toby. I remarked to her that we once had dog called Toby. Does that sound innocent? It did as I said it.

Yet, with the word we, I had just outed ourselves and that we had been together for a long time. The woman didn't bat an eyelid, as she shouldn't. She replied, our Toby can be a very naughty dog, was yours? 

Ex Sis in Law told us that one day on car trip home from our place that one of her then teen children asked if Uncle Andrew and Uncle R are gay. She answered them honestly and appropriately. 

Yet she also told us that when my father was dying and all family was there, one of my step mother's male grandchildren asked, 'Who are those old poofs?' Please, I was only early forties, not so old. Mid teen Oldest Niece piped up to her mother and said, I just knew it. I knew they are gay.

Which version to believe. Maybe the car conversation came after the visit to my dying father.

I ponder whether foreign born Australians face this and in some ways they do. Assumptions are made about them. Mother's cousin's first husband was born of Italian parents. His name is Bruno. Mother's parents did not want to go to the wedding in the inner suburb of Fitzroy where Bruno's family lived. Fitzroy had a reputation. Of course they did attend and very much enjoyed the Italian style wedding. 

Mother's newest eye doctor's name is Bruno and she said on the phone, I hope his accent is not too bad. I will need my carer son with me to translate and I will pretend I am deafer than I am. Eye surgeon Bruno is possibly third generation Australian and even if he is not, how good is his eye surgery? 

Mother is an absolute shocker for classifying people by race yet she loves Indian born nurses in hospitals because they are so kind, as was her former Filipina neighbour.

The backside

Sorry for the click bait headline. No I'm not. It was deliberate. 

With my neighbour HH at my suggestion, we took a paid back stage tour of our Arts Centre, which includes Hamer Hall and the larger building without a name, known as the Arts Centre. It needs a proper name. Before Hamer Hall was named thus, it was the Concert Hall. 

The tour, hosted by staff, one at the front talking and one at the rear to make sure we didn't wander away into the bowels of the earth, did not start well. Later HH and I agreed we were worried because she was hard to hear as she introduced herself inside Hamer Hall.

We walked outside and paused to hear her talk about the Arts Centre Spire, and she was marvellous, with her voice well projected and very easy to hear. 

Some of what I heard during the tour I already knew, especially about the construction difficulties but there were things I did not know and were very interesting. 

There is an excellent book called 'The Place Across the River', which covers the totality of the Arts Centre area and the history of what was formerly there. 

I've always enjoyed such tours of buildings and places, and this was no exception and well worth taking. We were given a a coffee voucher to use at one of the Arts Centre food venues, so HH and I had lunch, but I forgot to use my voucher. I can use it any time in the future. 

HH is a good talker and the time passed quickly. She turns 80 this year, but she won't tell me the date. Every second Friday she volunteers at the tourist Melbourne Information Centre. She is socially quite busy and has quite a large family who all live a long way away. Her son was a famous rugby...union? player and her daughter is a high achieving business woman, with a social conscience, and has received awards for her charitable works. Lol, HH says her daughter is so smart, she is scared of her. 

Anyway, here are a few photos I snapped.

I've forgotten about this painting, so I Guggled it and who would have thought? Up popped a photo I had taken of the same painting a number of years ago when we attended a concert. There are more of my photos there, I assume lifted from my blog. I didn't easily find out about the painting, so I gave up. I don't mind my photos being used but I should receive a credit for them at least. Marcus Wong wrote a very interesting post about the use of his photos and those of others, and how they brought down the company who stole their photos to use. 

https://wongm.com/2025/04/taking-down-a-profiteering-photo-thief-from-facebook/

Thousands of marbles are imbedded in a polymer surface. 

Queer things

OMG, this was the worst (maybe) public transport map I have ever seen, and it came from the official Public Transport Victoria website. No, the 604 bus does not run through Fawkner Park. The footpaths are narrow and it would be so inappropriate. Enlarged, what the 604 does when it arrives at Anzac Station gives no indication of the reality. Whether it was from my complaint or not, the map has now been corrected for both issues.

What hasn't been corrected in spite of my complaint is the timing of the bus. The 72 tram from Chapel Street to Anzac Station has twice the number of stops as the 604 bus and the tram travelling time is around 11 minutes. The 72 tram from Prahran is usually very busy. The time for the bus to travel the same distance is around 17 minutes, in both directions, so there is much waiting at stops along the way. As my Swedish death cleaning continues, I came across some old bus timetables and in 2005 the trip time for what I think then was the 220 bus, from Elsternwick Station to Domain Road, the location of Anzac Station, was 26 minutes. It is now 44 minutes.  

I saw this happen. The tram was correctly turning into Toorak Road from St Kilda Road when a food delivery motor cyclist went through a red light right in front of the tram and was hit. He or she seemed uninjured and so lucky. At the point where the motor cyclist and tram collided, the tram driver would have had no peripheral angle of vision to see motor cyclist coming. 

About three years ago we attended the funeral of Ron Walker, aka Miss Candee, and I blogged about it at the time, but that was on my old blog. The phone card featuring Miss Candee was for making calls from public telephones, if you recall what they were. 

I thought this map might impress JayCee who lives on the Isle of Man with the direct reference to the island, but not really. IOM seems to be in Northern Ireland. 

Isn't this just such a lovely photo. I will guess it is a Victorian Railways country train at Spencer Street Station getting up a head of diesel smoke before departure. 

I don't see the need to separate toilets between male and female, but this sign while accurate, doesn't sit comfortably for me. Suggestions? 

Plate my meal

I may have mentioned that I was interested in buying a new dinner set, and so I did. Phyllis did some ground work, as I asked him to, and sent me several links to various dinner sets. We agreed on one, which I had already seen myself. The online photos made it look like a very normal dinner set, but here is why I like bricks and mortar. I visited Myer again to make final check and I realised the dinner plates had very highly raised edges, and so would not fit in the dishwasher racks. Whew, that was a close call. 

The second dinner set Phyllis liked was also appealing to me, so that is what I decided to buy. Sunday was the day to buy it as it was discounted by 40%, the sale finishing that day. 

I inconvenienced Phyllis and Kosov by asking them to help me collect it on Sunday, and could they be ready by 11.00 to 11.30. I didn't know how much it would weigh or how bulky the box would be. Botheration and damn. There is a demonstration in the city and trams are disrupted. It would be a long walk carrying the dinner set to where we could catch a tram. I briefly considered Myer at Southland, but then I realised it was an online product, meaning it wasn't on display or boxed within the stores. It was either delivery, 3-7 business days for $9 or within 3 days for $13, or click and collect. Seven days would take us past Easter and that makes things complicated. 

Ok, I am not missing out on the 40% discount. I ordered click and collect at the Myer Melbourne store. Phyliss and Kosov were busy, so I took my shopping trolley into the city to bring home the dinner set on Monday. It would be quite rare for someone to take a shopping trolley on a tram to Swanston Street in the city, but I did. I made sure I used a level boarding tram and left the tram at Flinders Street and towed the trolley down to Coles in Elizabeth Street to buy something urgently needed. From there I needed to get to Bourke Street, so without a level boarding tram in sight, I clambered up the steps of an older tram and somehow tangled my legs in the trolley and so made a little dance to to regain my balance. I was extra careful when I left the tram to not embarrass myself a second time. This getting older business requires some thought and concentration.

My shopping trolley is similar to this. 

 Fortunately there was a free bench seat in Little Bourke Street to rest for a few minutes. Not too many people walk into Myer with a shopping jeep, but I did and I was pleased I did. The dinner set fitted into the jeep and from there it was a painless experience to get home. 

With what was in the dishwasher, the new dinner set made a full load and three hours after getting home, the cupboard shelf had been emptied of the old china and the new dinner set is in place. I am pleased. 

So, this is what the new dinner set looks like. It's maybe to your taste or not, but the important thing is that we three like it. 

Monday Mural

Along with Sami and others, here is my mural effort for this Monday. 

After his return to Australia from years in a British prison and the Uruguayan Ecuadorian Embassy in London, Julian Assange has been silent as he adjusts to a normal Australian life. The world is a better place for him exposing so many scandals around the world. He garnered a lot of public support, both here and abroad. 

I hope this mural remains for years to come. He needs to be remembered. 

Sunday Selections

I'm joining with Elephant's Child, perhaps not River this week, and others for Sunday Selections.

Just to taint this otherwise pure post, our own #47 wannabe PM Duttrump's has onboard shadow minister, Senator Jacinta Nampijinpa Price, for the ministry of Government Efficiency. Well, we've seen across the Pacific the chaos caused by DOGE, the 'Department of Government Efficiency', headed by Elon Muskrat. But when she declared her ambition to Make Australia Great Again, MAGA, oh fuckin' dear. Unless you are a seriously rich person, perhaps with a family trust or a director of a company, you'd be mad to vote for the conservative Liberal and National Party coalition. Be afraid of Peter Dutton. He will cut, cut and cut funding to everything that is important to Australians, line the pockets of big business and tax cuts for the rich, enrich consultants who have proved themselves as failures, and get rid of experienced and unbiased public servants, yet without offering anything better to the average Australian. 

I don't know why but it seems I never posted these 2023 fireworks photos. Fireworks are a bit of fun.

 

Saturdays and Wednesdays are when yachts come out to play. 

I took the lads to Altona Beach several weeks ago. Included are photos of when Ray and I visited just after the new pier opened. 

There's Ray's shadow and mine. 

Towards the end of last year I updated my will, which meant I had to visit State Trustees in Footscray. I caught the train and it was too hot to be out in the sun, but very short walk to the business via a small rather nice park was ok, except for this shipping container that seemed to be provided for the homeless of the area. I did not like.

Sister has a video tape player connected to her bedroom tv. I tried earlier this year to make it work to see what was on these tapes of Ray's but I couldn't get the system to work. Sister asked if they were safe to look at, meaning perhaps they had pron on them. Well, I don't know until I look at them, do I! It is quite unlikely. 

I walked past this bar called Jimmy O'Neills in Acland Street, St Kilda. I am sure every outdoor customer had an Irish accent. 

This car was part of art installation around St Kilda, with other cars spread around. 

Just another nice meal by Phyllis. 

The train was shorter back then. 

Phyllis bought some pull off sticky labels. There are less on the sheet now, than there is in this photo. I ordered the cactus to their bedroom. 

Right place at the right time. I just loved the lighting on the side of this city building. It being such a nice wall helped. 

The Home Front

Phyllis asked if I could take them our for a drive on Friday afternoon. He mentioned Point Ormond again. They both didn't have to work and I had only had vague stuff planned, so ok. They slept late, then both showered. While they body hygiene seems scrupulous, they don't shower every day. When they do, it will be a twenty minute shower. 

Phyllis said at about 2pm, we are going into RMIT in the city. I replied, you wanted to go for a drive. Either he had forgotten or he thought I had. 

We went for a drive, down Hotham Street and past the investment flat we used to own, to Balaclava, along Carlisle Street, then past the house Ray and I lived in before we moved here, down Chapel Street to Brighton Road and then to Glenhuntly Road with Elsternwick to our left as we turned right into Glenhuntly Road, through Ormond Village and on to Point Ormond. We walked up to the trig point, then down to a rock seawall. Their overt physical affection for each other was on display and I kept  looking at other people to see if they were noticing, but no one batted an eyelid. 

On to St Kilda where we parked in Woolworths underground car park, and bought a couple of things for dinner, as I had been commanded to cook! 

Back home via the Esplanade, Fitzroy Street, Lakeside Drive and Albert Road.  It was after 4.00pm, my rest time. 

By 5.40 I was in the kitchen. Phyllis had cooked exactly as I asked, 1.5 cups of rice. I am used to dealing with one cup of rice for two people. Half a cup more needs more spice and other ingredients. There weren't frozen peas for the fried rice. It will be less colourful, but still ok. 

The trouble with successfully cooking fried rice, they always want it again. 

Once the kitchen was cleaned, Phyllis embarked on his blueberry muffins cooking, made from scratch. They aren't too bad, but undercooked, although nice on the outside. He doesn't know the oven. It is a hot Italian oven, so once preheated, it cooks quickly.  For mine, if your want to cook muffins, buy a muffin mix box at the supermarket. 

I've trained them so well to use the dishwasher rather than washing dishes under a running tap. What won't fit in the dishwasher tonight, will fit in the dishwasher tomorrow. Rinse and repeat as required. 

Me snapping Kosov as he  snaps me.