I jumped ahead, so I need to backtrack to the Thursday the 18th. We revisited the lovely Blacksmith's cafe in Belsay for lunch.
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R's nephew and his family had prepared a feast for us. The nephew's mother, Sister 3 kept trying to help but was nudged away. After the meal she tried to start washing dishes and was again nudged away as the couple loaded up the dishwasher. Sister 3 was once a going out person, in fashionable clothing, with lots of drinking and smoking. About 2014 I can remember her going out to seeing a boy band. One Direction or one similar, with a hip flask full of vodka. She and her friends partied on in the gay nightclub area of Newcastle. Now, she is devoted to her family and helps them every way she can, that they will allow.
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Err, maybe not made it but it was her idea. Her mother paid.
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Make of it what you will but I've had some very frank chats with R's nephew late at night after our last visit to England. I am not saying I did, but I got some understanding of a how a gay guy can fall in love with a straight guy. He is just the absolute best. Personal photos are set to self immolate in 24 hours time.
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I do appreciate you taking us travelling with you. And love that the generations communicate and associate...
ReplyDeleteEC, one observation of mine is that different ages mix better in the UK. Gay, straight seems to matter less. Macho male married to submissive female, not so much. Family may not always connect but they still seem to stay in the same geographic area. Shop staff are probably paid the equivalent as here but are so much more friendly. I could go on...
DeleteThe country sceneries are very nice. You had a great reception when you were in UK.
ReplyDeleteRoentare, both and both.
Deletecanola, grows in my area.
ReplyDeleteCoffee is on, and stay safe.
Rather pretty in a field Dora.
DeleteFantasising about footballers and then about R's nephew - this is not good Andrew! You need to get a grip for you are R's plaything and nobody's else's!
ReplyDeleteYP, how little you imagine. Neither of us ever promised to be monogamous , and then we grew too old to bother.
DeleteGreat idea converting an old blacksmithery into a modern cafe.
ReplyDeleteHels, a very popular cafe for the old and wealthy local folk, and interlopers like us.
DeleteA feast indeed. What a wonderful send off they gave you.
ReplyDeleteIf R looks anything like his nephew I can understand your attraction.
Yep Caro. Everyone treated us so well there. R does not look like his nephew. I am attracted to his nephew by his wit, adventurous nature and that he can frankly engage with a gay guy in an honest manner.
DeleteOdd, that you are writing on a theme which hit me just a half an hour ago when I got a text from a man I hosted in my inn days who lives at the other end of the country and is in my province now and looking for a lunch date. I remember feeling attracted to him but he was coupled. I realize I may not be dead yet.
ReplyDeleteCrushes are important and I hear you. Keeps the old blood flowing.
XO
WWW
WWW, you are not going to bat your eyelashes at him, surely. You could be honest and tell him the truth about what you thought so many years ago. That worked for me once.
DeleteI'd say overall you and R had a wonderful time in England. The sad bit here is the elderly mother wanting to help and getting nudged away, because I have had the same happen to me, with my MIL not letting me "help" with anything years ago, I always felt excluded everytime we visited. And I certainly wasn't elderly or inept.
ReplyDeleteInteresting that you were so drawn to the nephew, perhaps he reminded you of a younger R?
River, yes we did have wonderful time.
DeleteSister 3 is younger than me, so of course not elderly. She has her own vacuum robot to run around to clean her carpet, yet she tried to do things that her son and his wife were perfectly capable of doing, like trying to push in to handwash when there is a dishwasher.
R does the same and no matter what I say he will hand wash things when there is space in the dishwasher and then complain how exhausted he is by cooking and washing up.
R's nephew is nothing like R. As he told me he has been faithful to his wife for 20+ years, but still, he does have his fantasies.
The footballers who live in Ponteland are the old guys, long retired like Shearer, Beardsley etc. Today's current players live in big houses in Jesmond and Gosforth. Ponteland is next to the airport, Darras Hall is ok, but I think you are getting too carried away about the footballers.
ReplyDeleteRachel, I am now shattered. Shearer must be 50 plus. If I want an old man, I can stay at home. Gosforth is where Sister 1 had bought an apartment. Posh area. We lunched at a Gosforth pub, and not a football player to be seen, not that I would recognise one anyway. Sorry, I am male and the male species does get carried away at the thought of sex, even if they can no longer do it.
DeleteHa! So much for your fantasies, Andrew. :)
DeleteI'd never even heard of Ponteland, to be honest.
That should have been Sister 1's partner in my own comment.
DeleteYes Steve. I was saved from myself. It is a nice town and I think part of its appeal is that you won't have heard of it.
DeleteGood to see the yellow of the canola.
ReplyDeleteMust have been a good chat, and hopefully it helped the nephew too as I'm sure it would.
They certainly put a nice spread on for you both, and what a shame they oust sister 3 from helping, such a pity.
Margaret, they didn't oust her harshly. Her son and wife were focused on what they were doing, cooking and cleaning up afterwards. After twenty plus years together, they knew what they what they were doing. There was no need for Sister 3 to try to help, but that is her nature. Like us, she was guest.
DeleteAccept help when it's offered, though sometimes it's difficult. Having a crush on someone unattainable is harmless - I think there's many a Catholic priest who has found himself the object of unrequited lust!
ReplyDeleteA priest JB? Really? But yes, I get that. Teenage hormones know no limit.
DeleteThe nephew's family certainly put on a good spread for you. R's family sound like good, generous folk.
ReplyDeleteJayCee, R's family and mine are terrific. That I am readily accepted as R's life partner by everyone without comment is pretty damned good.
DeleteA busy trip, with lots of family time.
ReplyDeleteTP, and I would not want it otherwise.
DeleteYou know, there is nothing quite so pure as two people talking to each other to discover what they have in common instead of focusing on their differences. I had a cousin. She was ostracized by her immediate family because she was gay. However, she was also a person of great substance and I could literally talk to her for hours. Her sexuality had nothing to do with our friendship. She was the godmother of my youngest daughter. I will never understand this outrage in my own country right now, the book banning, pushing people to corners, and ignoring them as much as possible. It's troubling.
ReplyDeleteDebby, it is very troubling, especially so as your country takes such a lead in popular culture. How will what is happening filter through your society and many others.
DeleteThe two photos with the sheep and distant canola yellow are so peaceful looking, I just love them, because I can be there in my mind. (which is quite imaginative). They prepared quite a lot of food and the goodbye pie, that was a sweet gesture.
ReplyDeleteStrayer, there would be few other places in the world as calm and peaceful as the English countryside on a nice sunny day.
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