In 1970 I was thirteen years old. By 1980 at 23 and I was in a same sex relationship with R and had began to work at the place I retired from forty years later. What a decade the seventies was for me, especially the profound effect on me of my parents separating.
In about 1975 I bought some soft porn gay magazines at a city bookshop. In 1977 I decided I was straight and burnt them in the incinerator at my grandmother's where I was living at the time. By 1978 I'd had three sexual experiences with women but only one proper one. Yeah, I could do it but always I was thinking of men. Men were just so fantastic, so sexual, always ready. There was no mystery about them. They really liked sex. They didn't need to be primed. They needed to get off, frequently and often. Foreplay may have been flirting and the act of picking up with some excitement, but the actual foreplay was a couple of seconds long before we were lunging at each other. It kind of seemed innocent to me as I learnt the ropes. It certainly felt natural.
I think in seventies my mind ricocheted from uncertainty and a natural instinct to go for what I wanted. An instinct about life I suppose.
Society was changing and after a long period of conservative federal governments, the reformist God Gough became Prime Minister because it was time. There are so many Australian celebrities of the time in the clip from the seventies. God Gough was duly elected.
Gay men and women were protesting on the streets for rights. We had heard of the Stonewall riots in New York. The music of the time was amazing and somewhat reassuring to gay men, especially Supernaut's song I Like it Both Ways. As far as I know they were all straight men, but open thinkers and I think they made others think more openly.
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Thanks for sharing yourself in this post, Andrew, and letting us get to know you better.
ReplyDeleteThanks Sandra. The post rather expanded over my original idea.
DeleteFuck me, now I know. I like the sound of always ready.
ReplyDeleteYou made me laugh Rachel. It may have been a slight exaggeration but not so far from the truth.
DeleteThis is a life story you are generous to share. To me, 90s is really special.
ReplyDeleteRoentare, please do not brag about how youthful you are, compared to me at least.
DeleteWell, the 90s was my decade. Heh... Now, with my husband eight years older, well... Good on you for staying with R! Living with someone isn't always fun, and I hope you enjoy your relationship and had career satisfaction more than not. For me and my guy, making one another laugh is key. :D As for microphones, I believe these are designed to defy wind. Don't mind me, I'm a tech geek if a failure at the science. ~rolls eyes~ Thanks for sharing these great videos, as well as your experiences.
DeleteDarla, yes laughter is a great thing to keep things going. We've certainly had our moments of war though. I'll take your word for it about microphones. I really don't know.
Delete"I could do it but always I was thinking of men"
ReplyDeleteI think it would have been far easier for me if gayness was the mirror version of heterosexuality that straights probably imagine it to be. But it's not, at least not for me. I could be attracted to women, turned on by a women, ever aroused by a woman, but once aroused, the wanting to do it with a male kicks in.
"If it made sense, all men would be heterosexuals, and all women would be lesbians."
--Edmund White
Without really answering Kirk, thank you. I is amused.
DeleteTo live through the '80s as a gay man must have been frightening. I am so glad you and R were a couple and well done on lasting all these years.
ReplyDeleteYou make it sound fairly straight forward realising you were gay but it must have been challenging as the '70s were still imbued with the prejudices of the '50s and '60s. Hell, those prejudices are still around.
My brother saw Skyhooks at the Beaumaris Community Centre. I had to settle for the Indelible Murtceps at the school dance.
Caro, the 80s were difficult. Many of us jumped on the condom advice. For some it was already too late. Some ignored the advice and paid the price. Many innocents paid the price. By the late 80s into the 90s, gay men dropped like flies including our friends back in the day when we had friends, and many who we knew. One quite special friend and a very attractive guy in our life went down hill with AIDS dementia in his early 30s and verbally attacked us for hanging his washing on the clothes line wrongly after we had done our best to clean his shit leakage stains from his carpet. I don't really want to remember.
DeleteOh, what a heartbreaking tale about dementia. I never knew that was a potential condition. So many lost; I'm sorry for yours. I knew folks suffering loss from AIDS but never experienced it myself.
DeleteDarla, it was certainly not the only AIDS dementia case we came across. Thank you.
DeleteDidn't look like lip synching to me. And don't they all hold the microphone close like that? it's one of my favourite songs so I watched all of it, but not the other two. That first girl was so expressionless, she might as well have been a mannequin. My 70s were very different, I was married and raising babies. I'm glad you found who you were though and you found R too.
ReplyDeleteThey do hold mikes like that River but having used a few in my life, would there not be P pops and a voice too close. You must have used a mike at your last workplace. I really don't know.
DeleteI cannot remember anything from 1975 - not music, not sex or any other thing - except for the destruction of the best government we ever had, under Gough Whitlam. On that day, democratic Australia was reduced to level of the nastiest dictatorship in other continents.
ReplyDeleteHels, yes that had a huge impact on me at the time, even though my understanding of politics was poor. I was among the protestors at the Legonda when Kerr's cur visited to dine.
DeleteOh yes, the cousin of our late friend was visiting her aunt in Domain Road and saw Kerr's car pelted with eggs. Or was that LBJ?
DeleteThe first video, so many faces I recognise. Rather like Shirley, notice the long hair.
ReplyDeleteWell you have had a go both ways! Primed, love that Andrew.
Margaret, was Jackie Weaver among them? I think I saw her. Primed? Men of a certain age are always primed but not those of my age, me included.
DeleteNo, didn't see her.
DeleteWe are very close to the same age. Interesting to hear your journey, mine was more circuitous.
ReplyDeleteTP, any idea that I was straight was an outright lie to myself.
DeleteUntil you mentioned them, I had never previously heard of The Skyhooks - nor their lead singer Graeme Strachan. I listened to the video - they made a good, tight sound and Strachan seemed like a natural frontman. Today, youngsters with homosexual urges must find it much easier to come out than in past generations. Not easy but easier.
ReplyDeleteYP, they do find it easier to come out and there is pressure on them to do so. I never came out, that is never had the conversation with anyone. If people didn't know straight away, it would slowly dawn on them. Young people have it hard in so many other ways now, especially gay men who have to 'fit'.
DeleteInteresting to hear more about your past. You were certainly adventurous for that time period! I came out in 1985 and it was hard enough even then.
ReplyDeleteI've never heard of Skyhooks or Supernaut. I am clearly behind on my Australian pop of the '70s! (Olivia Newton-John, however, I know.)
I'm not sure I posted my comment. ~shakes head~ I got caught up in watching videos you shared. Heh...
ReplyDeleteDarla, for old posts I have to approve comments, so they don't immediately appear.
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