Tuesday, July 29, 2025

Household annoyances

Cleaning seems to have ceased at The Highrise. The kitchen benches need wiping down, the stovetop needs cleaning. The big shelving unit needs sorting and cleaning, which was proposed by Phyllis. They respond if I write a list, so I may.

Their bathroom is clean, although for some reason Phyllis wanted the bathroom and toilet doors open today and twice he sprayed something. The rooms didn't smell to me, and I couldn't even smell what was sprayed. I prefer the two doors closed. There is no point heating them when they are so briefly used, and there are heat lamps in the bathroom for instant heat.

Early last week I asked Phyllis if he wanted a driving lesson. I was busy Wednesday and Thursday and he was at work both days anyway. Friday he had an English exam, and Saturday I was meeting a friend for brunch and had an Open House tour booked. We set the the driving day for Sunday. Come Saturday, he said he couldn't drive on Sunday as he needed to study for his English exam that has been postponed from Friday.

The driving could have taken about one and a half hours, leaving him plenty of time for study Ok, fine. But as I told him, I could have booked an Open House tour on Sunday but I set it aside for your driving lesson. 

Kosov worked Phyllis' shift today so Phyllis could attend the language test, and then after a couple of hours of finishing, Kosov went off to work his own shift at his workplace. Phyllis briefly returned home. He said he had done his best for the test, but he wouldn't know a result for up to five days. 

Then I heard the door shut and he was out again. Within a few minutes he messaged me that he didn't think he would be home until 7.30. This is code for me making my own dinner, which is fine. He knows if he is home, it is his responsibility to make my evening meal, whether cooked from scratch or preparing a meals on wheels, meal. Why didn't he just tell me when I saw him? Before you judge, my evening meal is his responsibility if he is home, after an agreement about a rent reduction. 

They are good lads, very loving and will do anything around the home that I want doing, but I don't want to have to keep asking, and I feel a bit like I am being taken for granted. 

Phyllis cooked some mini quiche, and although they didn't taste like traditional quiche, they were very nice. 


42 comments:

  1. Putting foot down with firm hand time, Uncle Andrew.
    Nice looking quiches though.

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  2. They get away with what they can. But that quiche looks good.

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    1. It was good Strayer, but didn't taste like it looked. That is, not conventional.

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  3. The food you cooked are fabulous looking

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    1. Phyllis cooked, Roentare. He takes food presentation seriously.

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  4. Andrew,, I suspect the language test is critical for his study and his place in Uni and perhaps progress can’t be made if he doesn’t pass. They do sound like terrific lads and perhaps they just wanted to give their bedroom a good airing, Here I am doing the Aunt from afar thing, looking after my adopted boys ! 😂
    My sons were given a little latitude during exam period as it is stressful particularly waiting for the results. I am sure normal routine will resume soon .

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    1. Oh yes, it is critical. And sounds ridiculously complicated. I don't understand how some students could possibly pass.

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  5. They're men, they literally don't see mess, I swear.

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    1. Pixie, its more that they are young and not experienced in looking after a home. They have improved. It was the driving lesson business that pissed me off.

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  6. You’ve been very patient managing things at The Highrise. It’s frustrating when cleaning slips and plans change last minute, especially after you rearranged your schedule for Phyllis’s driving lesson. A clear list might help keep everyone on track.
    Phyllis’s vague messages about dinner after a long day aren’t ideal since you agreed he’d handle it when home. Still, it’s good he made mini quiches—small efforts count.
    A calm talk about expectations could help avoid feeling taken for granted. You’re handling things well despite these annoyances.

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  7. I can't taste it, but Phyllis' food certainly looks good.

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  8. Sounds like you have two teenagers in men’s bodies sharing your home with you.
    Those savoury somethings with cheese topping look very very good.

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    1. Cathy, yes they are young, perhaps younger than their 22 years in ways. Mini quiche, and they were so good. He made heaps, so they lasted a couple of days.

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  9. What was the Open House tour? Did you enjoy it?

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    1. Hels, Saturday was of ABC at Southbank and Sunday was an on location talk about the vaults at Federation Wharf. I took photos at the ABC, which I will show down the track. Yes, I enjoyed it. I learnt a couple of things at the vault talk that I didn't know.

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  10. Yeah, the young 'uns can be saucy and thoughtless. But you're awfully good for each other. Maybe you need to be clearer about advance notice for both housework and meals and anything else?
    I hope the Open House was good, did you take pics?
    XO
    WWW

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    1. WWW, my mind is working on that. I took pics at the ABC studio tour. I will show them soon.

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  11. I hope things ease back to where you are not feeling taken advantage of. Perhaps Phylliss is simply juggling a few too many plates right now? The little quiches look yummy.

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    1. River, that's exactly what it is. A feeling of being taken advantage of, not that I am, well anymore than I want. Phyllis needs to prioritise, and they are both always late leaving for work.

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  12. Sounds like a bit of a frustrating week, but you're handling it with grace. Hopefully Phyllis gets a great result on his examand those mini quiches?

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  13. The food looks good, and you are so lucky that they can cook.
    Frustration is bound to happen, and I expect it's happened many times with them. 5 days waiting seems a long time wondering if you passed.
    Cleaning, never goes away.

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    1. Margaret, indeed I am lucky they can cook. Maybe five days is a worst case scenario. I did a good bit of cleaning today, but in the lounge and dining area. That's not where they spend much time.

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  14. Living with other people can often be trying. I hope it all settles down again to a proper routine.

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    1. I'll get over it, JB. I alternate between the effort of getting them to clean than just doing it myself, which is often easier and with a better result.

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  15. What a sweet dysfunctional family. Chosen family, maybe even accidental family, but you have formed a family unit, with all of the very normal interactions.

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    1. TP, yes it is and we aren't a bad little unit.

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  16. Sometimes in these situations the Air just needs to be cleared doesn't it? ( not referring to the open bathroom doors but the sense of being taken for granted!) Humanness I guess.
    Alison in Devon x

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    1. Alison, it is as much about perception as reality. But that's important.

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  17. Well, it definitely helps to have a cook in the house! Perhaps now that his English exam is past he'll be more conscientious about the cleanup and keeping you informed. Sounds like he had a lot going on.

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    1. Steve, the kitchen is spotless this morning. Yes, I because he can write and speak English very well, I didn't know how difficult the exam was. His score was very good, 7.5/10.

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  18. Here's hoping things settle down now that the English exam is in the rear view mirror. Living with others, while wonderful on so many levels, always has challenges, doesn't it?
    YOU take special care.
    Sandra sandracox.blogspot.com

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    1. Sandra, always a bit of a compromise, but that's what you do when sharing.

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  19. Sounds like typical young guys to me. It is too bad that they are making you feel taken advantage of though, Andrew. They will improve hopefully.

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    1. Pat, they are and perhaps a little immature for 22. They've never had responsibility.

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  20. Good insight Andrew. They simply have not had the experience of responsibility. It seems you are giving them a righteous lesson

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    1. Cloudia, what you suggest about responsibility is quite true.

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  21. All 22 yo are much younger than we were at that age. I shake my head watching them these days. And boys will be boys...

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    1. Jackie, while it didn't feel like it at the time, we were terribly mature at that age.

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