I don't do it often in the Highrise, but I spoke up loudly and eloquently. From in the morning "I am not cooking for you anymore and I am not going on holidays with you anymore", a nice meal of tuna mornay and rice appeared that night. Next morning I was invited to come along to his doctor's surgery while he had his new whiz bang shingles vaccination, followed by coffee and a bite to eat in the nearby cafe.
This was all caused by a third party family member who R suspects of something, and subsequently including his partner. The person in question is a bit of a wide boy and I don't trust him however, I've not seen a hint or any evidence. I cannot support R with his suspicions. I need to know something, just anything.
It has driven R to planning to change his will, and for other reasons, I think I may change mine too.
It is weird how I feel so very alone after the death of my mother. The tears have gone. No matter how crazy she drove us, now matter how frustrating she could be, no matter how painful she could be, how at times I dreaded her phone calls, I miss her. Just weird.
Tomorrow we are taking Hippie Niece and the cafe latte coloured twins to the Royal Melbourne Show. Family of four plus one concession and one ride pass to share, kaching, $180.
Hippie Niece can pay for the twin's showbags, and the food. We will meet her at Melbourne Flinders Street Station and catch a dedicated train from there to the show. The last time we went to the show was when we took 30 year old Hippie Niece at her age of 16. The train line is only in service for horse racing events and the show.
Our security system is being updated to what is pretty well now standard in high rise apartment buildings. You have to touch your fob to a panel in the lift to go to your floor. You can't go to any floor other than public floors. Visitors have three minutes to get to your apartment by lift from when you open the front door for them.
It was to 'go to air' on the 1st of June. It has been on and off again since then, mostly off. It finally went live for good nearly two weeks ago, except it didn't. It lasted two days and a notice appeared that there were glitches between the intercom and the lift, so the system would be turned off for a couple of days. It is nearly two weeks later and the system is still not working. We also discovered we can touch our fob on in the lift and go to any floor.
There will be a bicycle clearance from the storage area. I've decided to let my bicycle go. It works like this; your bicycle is tagged with a label. If you want your bicycle to stay, remove the label. I won't and I've unlocked it. The bike will go into storage for six months and then be disposed with. It is a very old bike, once my sister's bike who gave it to Tradie Brother when he lost his driving licence and then to me who used it recreationally and to go the the South Melbourne shops for a couple of months. Nah, I am over bike riding.
Back to the show. For two adults and two children it will cost them $30 for public transport to get to and from the show. I would not dream of putting myself through the stress of driving and parking to visit the show, yet parking is only $25. I can see why car commited people would choose to drive over using public transport.
Latest update: One twin had hurt her finger on a boat? and it will be x-rayed tomorrow morning. So instead of 11am at Flinders Street, it will be 11.30 or more likely noon.
The bike room. There is a smaller one as as well.
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I wonder how many bikes will have their tags removed. That's an expensive show.
ReplyDeleteStrayer, from the history of this happening at least twice in twenty years, quite a few will go. The world is full of people with the best of intentions. Not my bike but I am sure there are some very expensive bikes there.
DeleteI am glad that your eloquent words have smoothed things at the Highrise.
ReplyDeleteThat is a heap of bikes as Strayer said. And yes, my bike riding days are done. Himself bought a new one a few years ago and it has been largely neglected. I suspect it will continue to be.
I hear you on missing your mama, no matter how much she infuriating you from time to time.
Hugs.
EC, things maybe ok now, but I haven't worked out the accusations he has made with any substance. Thank you, dearest.
DeleteWhat a lot of bikes. Hope your key fob doesn't strand you there. You could be there for some time.
ReplyDeleteTasker, it would not be the best place to locked in to.
DeleteIn many cases, even if irritating, our mothers are one of the few that offers us unconditional love that we don't find from others and when that is gone we feel the aloneness keenly. Hope all goes smoothly and stays that way on the home front. Hugs S. sandracox.blogspot.com
ReplyDeleteSandra, I think what you say sums it up rather well. Thanks.
DeleteBlood counts thicker than water. It is perfectly normal to miss the loved ones. Hope you will recover. Life goes on. I have come across a few existential crises. These times were pretty horrible.
ReplyDeleteRoentare, it is no big deal and I am sure part of the normal grieving process. Lol, I am a constant existential crisis person. There isn't an answer. We just get on with it.
DeleteStalker
ReplyDeleteTake R to Saturday Yum Cha at Wong Baby and write a review! That might cheer him up!
To have your Mum in your life for such a long time, and then not is an everlasting mountain of memories, for you to recall her and hold forever. 🙏
Stalker, you seem to know more about my city than I do. Taking R for lunch would be too out of character. You speak wise words about memories of parents.
DeleteIs "fob" an Australian slang word for a penis?
ReplyDeleteHope you all have fun at The Royal Melbourne Show.
Fob YP, is perhaps how an Australian might describe an English penis.
DeleteDoes R try to fob you off?
DeleteHe did in about 2004 and that was then we became good friends who live together.
DeleteI'm glad that you spoke up loudly and eloquently. It seems to have done the trick. That is a whole lot of bikes. How many people live in your high rise???
ReplyDeleteDebby, a quick mental calculation, well calculator, around 300 residents. The majority are three bedroom apartments, somewhat unusual.
DeleteI barely knew about shingles in the older days, but now it seems like the first thing doctors test for in older patients.
ReplyDeleteHels, I've not been tested but I thought it was prudent to have the vaccination. I've seen the effect on three different women.
DeleteI think it wise to revisit wills rather than set and forget.
ReplyDeleteYou will always have those feelings about mum. Difficult as they were, they were the first person in our lives and their absence will always leave a hole. There was a time when I actually hated my mother but when she died I was genuinely upset.
Who threatened to stop cooking? I thought R was chief cook and bottle washer. Either way the tuna mornay sounds delicious.
Those bikes look expensive. Do people really just abandon them? More money than sense.
Hope the Show trip is going ahead and you survive. I am sure the good scottish doctor will make a visit this evening!
Thanks Caro. Yes, R threatened to stop cooking and then didn't. I was getting so fed up with his nonsense, I played the guilt card at him.
DeleteI would hope the expensive bikes would not be abandoned. Two months to remove the label, six months to retrieve them from storage, and then they go to charity.
We barely survived the show. It was our last time. Sadly on Wednesday the Scottish doctor is off duty.
Life with R and A. I understand what your post was saying. (I liked it.) I miss my mum everyday and she was 'difficult' in life. I've changed my will 3 times in the last 10 years. I can see myself changing it again. Sometimes these things just have to be done.
ReplyDeleteRachel, thank you. Are you changing charities in your will or changing family members?
DeleteCharities??? No. The other.
DeleteYou can leave all your money to me. To anyone reading here who is shocked, Andrew KNOWS I am kidding.
ReplyDeleteThat's a lot of bikes. I have a pump like that, down in the shed where the bike also lives, unused and dusty.
The show is expensive now, but the twins are old enough to properly enjoy it and perhaps they don't need to go every single year.
I haven't made tuna mornay in yonks.
Not all money River, just a share. I need your date of birth and home address.
DeleteAside from the admittance, my god was it expensive. A figure will be written down tomorrow by R.
When they go to the show again, we certainly won't be with them. The deafening music noise was the worst, constant.
Dear me, changing a 'Will', must be something that R is against that the 'boy' has done or did - a gut feeling or something seen in person.
ReplyDeleteHa! your words worked well because you got a nice meal/s.
The show only comes once a year, enjoy.
Many bike there, our bikes have gone as we no longer need them.
Margaret, all R has is unfounded suspicions, that would be grave if true. We've always been trusted with children.
DeleteYep about bikes, an mine is soon to go.
I was given a bicycle a year ago and still haven't plucked up the courage to ride it. I would probably fall off. I recognise those feelings you have about your mum. It will be quite some time before they begin to fade I think.
ReplyDeleteJayCee, if you don't drive and don't cycle, your transport options are becoming limited, but then you do have a tram and a bus nearby. Yes, I am sure my mother memories will reduce soon enough. Just not quite yet.
DeleteAh you’re going to The Show - on Show Day as well….wish you luck.
ReplyDeleteMake sure you have your Bex handy when you get home. You’ll probably need it - and a good lie down after taking it.
Is it Show Day Cathy. Oh dear. I think I needed some of this new drug to us, fentanyl.
DeleteLots of interesting family news, there! I know what you mean about your mom -- as you know I lost mine a few months ago and I still feel the absence acutely.
ReplyDeleteCan you sell the bike? Or is that more trouble than it's worth?
Steve, my bike would be worth nothing beyond the barely used new tyres.
DeleteRe mothers, absence is a good word.
You lost your mother I lost my husband, although
ReplyDeleteI know Gattina. That is mega life experience.
DeleteI lost my mother the grief is not the same, I don't feel the same anymore I continue living but it seems to me as if I walk besides myself. I hope it will change when I have moved and will know new people.
ReplyDeleteFor your sake Gattina, I really hope the change to your castle accommodation will help you move on.
DeleteI hope peace and harmony will be fully restored very soon.
ReplyDeleteMy mother died more than 20 years ago and I miss her still and always will.
It has been JB. Thanks.
DeleteSome miss their fathers terribly but I never did. Although she was diminished by her old age, Mum will certainly missed this Christmas.
Be nice to one another, decades of love.
ReplyDeleteWith my Tina wig firmly in place TP, What's love got to do with it.
DeleteI'm sad to read of this contention and missing your mother. I have the opposite weird issue regarding Mom. We were very, very close but her long cognitive decline left me feeling her loss years before she passed away.
ReplyDeleteOn a bright note, the show looks like fun. And now I want an Airforce One showbag since I never grew up. Heh...
Oh, and I find the bicycle rooms interesting. We should sell ours, honestly. They're just collecting cobwebs and taking up garage space.
DeleteDarla, we were spared that, fortunately. It must be hard when the person you know has gone, but not quite physically.
DeleteAn Airforce One showbag sounds expensive. We spent quite enough yesterday.
Life is certainly a ride sometimes. I hope all is calm at your place now.
ReplyDeleteMy mum has been gone for a few years now and I still miss her.
All good now Pat. I guess there are different stages to go through as memories slowly recede.
DeleteNow that's a lot of bikes:)
ReplyDeleteSandra sandracox.blogspot.com
It is Sandra. While I was there I should have checked them for dust and see how many are regularly used.
DeleteWhat lovely uncles you are!
ReplyDeleteXO
WWW
One of us is WWW. The other just says tell me how much I owe you.
DeleteI can understand why you wouldn't want to use them, but I'm assuming your high-rise still has good old-fashioned stairs as a backup.
ReplyDeleteStairs Kirk? I may look like I am 30 but I am not. The stairs are unlocked and have to remain so as a fire escape route, but the entry door to the stairwell on the ground floor needs a fob to open.
Delete