Well, one's Mother might die and the funeral organising takes a lot of time, mental energy, family discussions and travel on the dreaded Monash Freeway and the toll road CityLink, life goes on and we kept our booking for Saturday night at the Torquay Hotel to celebrate our great niece Ju's third birthday. Her normal for young children shyness has gone and she will at least high five us. I can't believe how much we spent on her birthday present but she did seem to really like it.
We had a grand time on Saturday, with a couple of hundred children among us. Ok, it just felt like that but the noise level was high. After the party with food for Ju's birthday we chatted. We checked into our hotel and after a break, returned to Fire Fighting Nephew's home. Homemade hamburgers were served as we watching some girls kick a round ball around. The noise levels increased but not by children at this stage. I don't understand the girl ball game. It is supposed to be 90 minutes but the match went for five hours.
It was a fun night. We returned the next morning for Ex Sis in Law's husband to feed us with sourdough French toast adorned by blueberries, strawberries, maple syrup and bacon. After breakfast, we headed for home.
I'll spare you the somewhat gruesome details but essentially Mother died from low oxygen levels. Tradie Brother saw her the day before and she was very alive, chatty and complaining. It has hit Sister very hard. I knew Ex Sis in Law would be very emotional at the hospital and she was, and that was when I cracked up. Sister wailed and cried outright at the bedside of her dead mother. Sister's daughter Jo is also very upset. All the others are sad but not emotional. Of course, it is not their mother.
At about 10.00 pm the day Mother died, I sat on the balcony with a glass of the Scottish doctor in my hand and did my crying and sobbing. R was inside and heard me.
R has been very solicitous. Mother loved him like a son so it isn't easy for him either.
Ah, this is getting a bit hard to write. Take two.
For stalkers, her funeral is to be held in her home town on Monday the twenty first. You can work it out.
On her deathbed, Mother's grey hair was really starting to show. Her long time hairdresser will come to the funeral. We used dry shampoo and combed her hair. But by golly, she didn't die without her nail polish on. She was rather vain.
There is still much to sort out. Blog posts may happen or not, ditto for comments on blogs.
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A lot going on there Andrew, some happy, fun times in amongst the sadness. Real life.
ReplyDeleteJayCee, indeed we alternate between both emotions.
DeleteI am so glad that you had a family celebration in the midst of the sadness. So very glad.
ReplyDeleteYes, it was really good EC.
DeleteWriting about these things probably helps, and also helps others even though we lost parents and others hears ago, so thank you. Things take a long time to work through.
ReplyDeleteThanks Tasker. I tell myself that most of my blogmates have already been through this and understand. But at times logic doesn't work so well.
DeleteWell darn it all, but as you say, life goes on. What a character your mum was, to the end, with the nail polish.
ReplyDeleteStrayer, what will you care about on your deathbed? What will I?
DeleteIt is never easy to send off a parent. Best wishes to you and your family.
ReplyDeleteIt isn't Roentare, and I can't just hand it all over to someone else.
Deletebeautiful photo of the Nail Polish
ReplyDeleteBright colours were her choice Kent. Thanks.
DeleteThose hands say it all.
ReplyDeleteCaro, they do tell a story. I don't think she ever had unpainted nails.
DeleteThanks for the update. Your adoring public will wait patiently for your full return.
ReplyDeleteOvercooking the egg, YP. But I am grateful for the online support and kindness.
DeleteAh Andrew it's not easy at all, up and down like a toilet seat. Of all the things the nail polish hit me like a ton of bricks. My darling mother was menticulous about her nails. Tears again as I type this.
ReplyDeleteXO
WWW
That's a sweet memory I've kindled for you WWW. I think you were her only daughter?
DeleteI was for a long time until baby sis oopsed when mum was in her forties.
DeleteXO
WWW
Thinking of you. It is not easy but you have a good group around you specially R. Hugs.
ReplyDeleteThanks Pat. Yes, we are all supporting each other.
DeleteAll this running around will keep you occupied for a while - just watch out for the ‘crash’. After the farewell maybe a short time away with R and return with renewed energy.
ReplyDeleteMother's and Step Father's ashes will be sprinkled into the sea at the bottom of Rose Avenue, Cowes. It is planned we will stay on Phillip Island for a few nights. We will wait until the weather is warmer.
DeleteOf course she needed her nail polish, one must look one's best when striding through the Pearly Gates. I've never organised a funeral, bith my parents were cremated, and my brother paid for that. All I had to do was visit at the funeral home to be sure they had the right person in the box.
ReplyDeleteGlad the birthday party went well.
Indeed River, good nail polish gives an immediate pass through the gates. I guess your brother organised the funeral too?
DeleteThere weren't funerals, mum and dad were taken from the hospitals they died in to the funeral home where we saw them for identification (don't want to be burning the wrong people) and from there we went home and the bodies went to crematoriums. My brother picked up the ashes a week later each time.
DeleteAndrew: A Mother holds her children's hands for a short while, but they each have the other's heart forever.
ReplyDeleteLove the nails :)
Hugs xoxox
That's a lovely expression Margaret. Thank you.
DeleteIt's only when both parents have died that you really become a grown-up - at least, that's how it feels.
ReplyDeleteJB, while I am giving away my future blog post ammunition, my first emotion was I felt terrible alone in the world.
DeleteSo sorry to hear about the death of your Mom Andrew. Hopefully she didn't suffer. I'm sure once all the legalities are done with, you will feel a bit sad and miss her. Big hug xx
ReplyDeleteThanks Sami. I expect many times I will feel sad.
DeleteWhatever your level of grief, your writing remains as witty as ever.
ReplyDeleteAh, I have to back and check what was witty, Kirk. Ah yes, there is some wit there. Thanks.
DeleteGrieve in your way, others will also. Take care of yourself.
ReplyDeleteWe will TP. Thanks.
DeleteI understand the "much to sort out" part. My mom also died wearing nail polish, which she NEVER wore in life. (The carers insisted on using it at her at her retirement home. It seemed a small thing so we never complained.)
ReplyDeleteThat's interesting and perhaps wrong if she had a reason to not wear nail polish.
DeleteI'm so sorry for the loss of your amazing Mother Andrew!
ReplyDeleteThanks Snoskred. You are kind.
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